The Jets & the Mules

For you football-oriented in my life, I am sure you think that this is going to be a story about Charleston's attempt to get into the NFL.  Sorry.  And I understand if you opt out of reading more, though I will say in my defense that it is a really good tale of fast planes and hybrids....c'mon, give it a chance..

This is a story about what  happened when the Blue Angels came to town....and the impact to the mules and the reaction of the birds.
Lets begin with the Blue Angels.  They're the Top Gun-type pilots from the Navy and Marine Corps who fly shatteringly loud and beautifully sleek jets so close to each other over cities and harbors that all on the ground end up with the same expression of wonder and fear.  Everyone actually ducks, thinking they are coming in way way way too close to the earth!

These red-white&and-blue jets fly so close to each other that  your eyes tell your brain there is going to be a collision.  Sometimes, a single plane will be swooping over and then turns its nose up so severely that it absolutely looks like a missle. I love our military (and believe that without the politicians and head honchos, they represent the best of the USA) so watching them practice for their weekend show was an absolute thrill. And since the show was going to take place over the harbor, they were, in essence, practicing right over our house!  I wish they would have landed and I could have given them a sample of my latest granola recipe!

These brave, talented, and might I add, buff pilots were, at first, the toast of the Charleston newspaper, the Post & Courier.  Even the Blue Angels commander had a Charleston connection, having gone to the Citidel military academy here.  (For those who don't know, the Citicdel is the West Point of the South....though now that I think of it,  people here would probably reverse that and say that West Point is the Citidel of the damn North >>> but I digress.)  So lets back to the contorversy that erupted.

I've come to observe, after my short time of living here, that drama is very prominant in the Southern soul.  Everything seems to have the potential to get someone mad or call the police or even suggest a controversial, conspiritorial act.  In fact, all three seem to happen with regularity and just minimal provocation!
So, I wasn't totally surprised to learn that the town and the Blue Angels were having a bit of a tussle...I just wasn't expecting it to involve the mules!

Yes, mules.  Lets focus on the mules for a moment:  Why are there mules in Charleston you ask?  Turns out, they've been here since pretty much the beginning of Charleston's history (which is, if you can fathom, 1670!!) The mules, or more accurately the mules' owners, take great pride in claiming to be a major reason for Charleston's popularity..  You see, to take a tour of historic Chrleston, you can get on a bus, take a walking tour or hop aboard the most charming of carriages and saunter through the town, being pulled by a mule or two mules or even a horse. 
But the mule is the best...he (or she) with the ears the size of a pyramid is the most regal of them all.  Remember, a mule is, lets use the trendy word, a hybrid between a girl horse and a boy donkey and they actually get better mileage than either of their parents.  Also, and I see this as a big advantage, they are infertile, so you don't have to worry about them getting pregnant. As a parent, I like that!

The South has always loved and used the mule, and resent all the talk about their supposed stubborness.  Mule-lovers, and I have now actually talked to a few, say instead that..."mules have a stong sense of self-preservation.  If they are overheated, overworked or overused for any reason, they stop, and they will not move.They are just trying to tell you that they are tired.  Horses work til they drop dead.  Why don't they get criticized for being suicidal." 

I love this kind of logic.  It is just not refutable.  And so, to me now, the mule seems pretty darn smart! So why would they have a problem with Blue Angels?  Turns out it was the politicians who couldn't leave things alone!
Whether real or imagined, the Town fathers decided that the odds that the mules would revolt or have heart attacks when the Blue Angels engines roared over head were big. 

I think they envisioned the headline the next day of a tourist being thrown from the carriage or the ASPCA sueing Charleston for 'inhumane/inmule treatment'.  So they banned all tour carriages using mules banned during the air show. (They banned the horses too, but no one seemed to get all worked up over that!). 

Proprieters of mules argued that their mules were mellow as could be and were too cool to be spooked.  But nothing could change the minds of the town politicians, whose paranoia about even a single tourist going flying out of the carriage while the other flying was going on, was clearly palpable.  (They have their careers to protect after all....don't all Charleston politicians end up in Washington DC>>>???) 

So, while the Blue Angels flew, the mules rested in their barns.  And though I don't know this personally, I bet they actually liked having a two hour nap on a Saturday  and Sunday!  Irony rules!

So, the Blue Angels soared overhead.  And were amazing......And clearly had power over the mules.  But, they didn't have power over three pelicans who kept swooping up after the pilots were circling around....and these three pelicans, also soared, also flew in tight formation and, I swear, one of them made eye contact with me and communicated clearly as if speaking to me:  "See human, we can fly too.  In fact, we fly better, tighter and  have the additional edge of being completely sympatico with the mules of Charleston,"  Good point I thought. 

The Blue Angels are amazing and remind me that Afganistan, and all the 'stan' countries for that matter, don't have a chance against us, but the bird reminded me that nature, mules and birds included, is even more amazing!  Here's to Monday when the birds and the mules return to rule Charleston.
sending love from Charleston